Bowser’s Plan B, Part Two (Updated)

Read Bowser’s Plan B, Part One

#33 – Absolut Terror

Wow. Talk about starting an article on a winner. I can assure Chaos that he is completely correct: this comic is “absolut” terror, and so is his attempt at spelling. I am not certain what possessed Chaos to believe that this was an okay punchline to make, since there isn’t one. I mean, come on, Chaos: you’re not going to turn out like hatkirby and just vomit out whatever random bullshit comes to your mind and call it “humor”, are you? Well, it isn’t. Humor requires thinking and effort. This comic required a couple minutes in MS Paint and a loss of dignity. And I can just bet you that those sycophantic cocksuckers are going to praise it like it was the new Mona Lisa—just you watch.

Chaos was silent in his personal post, probably because he felt too much shame to say anything. Hell, if he wasn’t going to put any effort into making a true comic then he sure as shit won’t bother typing up any post. Hell, he was too god damn lazy to spellcheck the title of his fucking comic. I think he could win some kind of world record for that kind of performance.

One may guess that Anonymous had a field day with this one. But let us see what our Commander replies with, shall we?

Taking the mick out of manga. They always have pointless pages, that are meant to be ‘artistic’. Nothing is safe from the mick-take.

You know, Chaos, I’m getting quite sick of this Irish hatred. Just like the supposed Mexicans stealing U.S. jobs, Chaos believes that Irish people are ruining manga with their pointless pages and shitty sprite rendering. I’ve personally never seen this kind of work in a manga, so the “satirical” element goes over my head. Then again, I’ve never seen a manga created by an Irish person, so that may be the explanation.

For the record, Chaos, your satire is lost when you do this kind of bullshit normally; unless you care to tell me that all of that was satirical, too. Hell, maybe he expects me to believe that the whole comic is shitty as “satire”. Yeah, that’s definitely it.

Player One:

this one is rather meh…. but i’ll give you a five ’cause anonymous sucks cock for bus fare and still walks home.

Player One tries so hard to make fun of people, but fails so harshly. You could have just said “you suck anonymous”, and it would have been just as intelligent, really. I’m just glad he actually typed in almost-correct English, with the exception of no capitalization. What, do none of these people have “Shift” buttons or “Caps Lock”?

I also love the logic of his voting. I’ll vote five, not because it is quality work, but just to spite some stranger on the internet. Never mind that Anonymous’s complaints are completely valid. This post was completely neurotic, but I’m going to rate it a five out of five, because my next-door-neighbor is a dick.


haha, good one PO.

Jesus, are these two in middle school? It didn’t even make sense. If Anonymous sucked cock and walked home, then it wasn’t for bus fare at all. It would be like saying “I prostituted myself so I could buy lettuce… and didn’t buy lettuce!” Then I guess you didn’t prostitute yourself for lettuce, dumbass. It took me two seconds, by the way, to come up with the equivalent of “PO”’s humor.

#34 – 12 Ton Fiery Death

Okay, seriously, fuck this bullshit. More of your genius “satire”, Chaos? Considering nobody else I’ve ever seen has produced work this terrible, I question the satirical value of this comic. Then again, Chaos fails at normal humor, so it’s no surprise he cannot make authentic satire.

And for god’s sake, he only has text, and he still fucks it up. Did this guy just scribble on a piece of paper and turn it in as an essay in his language arts classes? Now it all makes sense: he’s over twenty-one and still goes to school because he was too much of a dumbass to graduate high school, so he’s a super duper senior. All so he can show up those god damn Irish manga artists!


On what grounds do you insult me? Give a reason.

Let me point out that this is the first post; Anonymous had not commented yet. Chaos, you need to stop talking to yourself and get back to making actual comics. Maybe then the voices in your head will stop yelling at you.

Some guy who’s not logged in, so I don’t know his name:

well i dont see you with a comic other anonymous

Sorry, I can’t understand this comment because I don’t understand Dipshitese.


And anyways Looney Tunes are a classic an hilarious old cartoon series, you uncultured, ignorant idiot.

Am I the only one who finds it hilariously pathetic that these two are bad-mouthing Anonymous when he hasn’t even posted anything? Are they just imagining things Anonymous said so they can make fun of him? Chaos is the loony one, I’m fucking serious.


Yeah anomymous, If you hate this comic, 1} make your own comic like I said early, and 2} go away.

You tell that person not there! Maybe you’ll eventually work up the courage to tell off the girl who wouldn’t go out with you to your mirror.


Sorry commander chaos but a squech and a long foooooom isn’t a comic.

Wait, so he did hate it, too? Then why are you complaining about Anonymous? You are apparently in agreement with him. Then again, Anonymous never even complained about it, so maybe for some odd reason this is the one comic he actually enjoyed.


a comic it may not be, but I promised all 5s for killing mcCloud, so, a 5 it is.

We laugh about it, but think of the bigger implications of this kind of thinking. I just wonder if he votes for any president who says that he hates Fox, no matter how fucked up he/she is. Oh my god, I just realized that many of these people can vote; that is the scariest thought I’ve ever had. I wonder when they run into someone who complains about the president they just bitch at them and say great things about the president, like they do to Anonymous:

“Hey, Obama is spending us even farther in debt!”

“oh yea well why dont u run your own country then and leave this country if you hate it soooo much. you suck so much dick to pay for your phone bills but dont even pay your phone bills”

#35 – Dun Dun DUUUUUUUN!

What Baby Bowser says in the final panel is what anyone reading his comic is saying to themselves. Actually, compared to the previous two monstrosities, an actual comic is pretty refreshing; and at least Chaos did not fuck things up too much here. I’m sure Anonymous will make up some way to hate this comic, like “what the fuck baby bowser’s face cant turn green. not funny.”


This comic gets worse and worse. Why would Meta Knight want to kill Kirby anyways? Meta Knight is a good guy.

Okay, apparently he made a comment even more ludicrous. Meta Knight has tried to kill Kirby many times. And are you implying that this comic is worse than the previous one? Face it, Anonymous: we all know Chaos has hit the apex of incompetence. There’s no way to go but back up to just regular incompetence.

Oh fuck, they just blab on about Kirby canon. No need to bother with that bullshit.

#36 – Served

Served a big bucket of ass. What relevance does this even have to the story, anyway? Oh wait: I bet Chaos is satirizing those damn Irish manga makers again! Ho ho ho, that was close. I almost thought he was incompetent. For the record, any time you’re not laughing, it’s because I’m satirizing writing that is not funny. Like right now. And now. And now.

Nice font, by the way. It’s so gorgeously unreadable and tacky. Remind me again why you believed cursive made the best font choice for a silly Mario comic.



Your criticism is, that’s for sure. God, you’re just as mindlessly uncreative as Player “you suck Anonymous” One. Although, I will say that that joke he made earlier was oh-so clever. I’m going to tell that bus fare joke to everyone I know tomorrow morning.


And you call me an idiot…I pity you.

He never called you an idiot… oh wait, you’re talking to the voices in your head again. Sorry to disturb you two.


Firstly, learn to spell. It’s not ‘retarted’ it’s ‘retarded’, and second, you can’t just say that a comic is lame, you have to give a reason. If you weren’t an idiot, you’d know that the comment boxes were put in fir CONSTRUCTIVE criticism. Judging from your level of maturity in your response, I’d say you were on par with Gatorsmash and Ryan. Congrats, you are now officially a living brain donor! If you both don’t like this comic, surely it makes more sense that, instead of being vindictive and childish, you just don’t read it?

Also, by reading this comic you are increasing the page views on it, so more people will read it!

I guess he ruminated on his complaints even more and had more he had to say.

I’m seriously worried about Chaos. I don’t see anything here about your comic being “retarted”, Chaos. I would also question the “Gatorsmash” and “Ryan” comment, but I’m sure he’s just making obscure references there. Many dipshit sprite comic creators do that, unfortunately. As for the constructive comments, part: good luck with that. You’ll find constructive opinions in your commentary section like the U.S. found weapons of mass destruction in Iraq.


you spelled “for” wrong…

now whos the brain donor?

And it is true, your avatar is retarded.

I will make some defense of Chaos: Anonymous shouldn’t make fun of his spelling errors when he himself makes some pretty embarrassing ones.


hmmm. it does say ‘you got served’.

garn. i was trying real hard not to plaigarise your comic.

ah well, in payment for the offending line, please accept this 5.

I’m not sure what world shadowmaster lives in in which he believed this post made any sense. I’m also not sure what world he lives in in which he believes “garn” is a word. What, are you censoring “darn”? The Amish wouldn’t even go that far.


Hey, anonymous your avatar sucks too, even though you don’t have one?

It’s like Nintendude lost confidence in his joke and then asked it as a question, as if saying “Hey, Anonymous, will this joke burn you or not?”


okay, I made the voodoo doll, I’ve got some Everclear and a lighter, so now I just need to know this guy’s name, and I’m set…

Has anyone ever noticed that the things this guy types are not the type of ideas that any sane person would have? That comment pages ago was meant to be facetious; but now I’m starting to think that he truly is in a mental clinic.

#37 – ‘Out To Lunch’?!?

Hey! Chaos actually told a joke! It may have been a trite, painfully unfunny joke; but at least it is a true joke, and not random bullshit. We’re making progress!

I’m still curious as to what relevance any of this has to the plot that… I’m still not sure what the plot is, actually. Oh wait, didn’t Mario send this asshole to kill Bowser? Now it makes sense.


This one’s pretty good. Funny, good background. But LINK SHOULD NOT BE IN THIS COMIC!!!

Hell, even this motherfucker liked it; that proves that he has lower standards than I do, because I still say it’s shit. Be honest: you sighed at that joke, like every shitty Family Circus joke. And why would you praise someone for having a nice background? Because Chaos does it so rarely, despite the fact that it only requires the ability to find a good-looking background in a video game and import it into MS Paint without resizing it shittily?

I’m not quite sure why Link should not be in this comic, either, but it seems to me that Anonymous sometimes just makes up his own rules. CHAOS YOUR CHARACTERS SHOULD NEVER WEAR HATS!!!


Anonymous: SHUT THE HELL UP. NOBODY CARES WHAT YOU THINK. Maybe if you’d quit hiding, we would, but for the moment…all you are is a nameless sillhouette with a question mark for a face.

It is funny, true; it does have a good background; but CC has a right to use whatever characters are seen fit.

Wow. Considering the high vote Anonymous gave this comic—a fucking four, which is eight levels too high—they seem to be really pissed at him. Are these the same dumbasses who bitch when their favorite game gets a 9.8 out of ten, or something? In fact, it’s always the ones where Anonymous is not harsh on his comics that they complain. Then again, considering these are the same people who bring up that “anonymous people can’t have opinions, because then we’d have to think up an actual logical reason why his opinions are wrong” bullshit, it’s no wonder.


Well, at least he gave higher than a one for once in his pathetic life.

I often feel bad sometimes for making fun of these sprite comic artists. Thankfully, these people are all such assholes that I feel absolutely no remorse.


sorry, I don’t like the sign that magically appeared.

Wait, that’s the flaw that got this comic a lower score than Anonymous’s? I just hope he’s just satirizing Anonymous here. Actually, that would be one of the first clever things someone did in this forum.

#38 – Trigger Happy Intruders

Let me just say, once again, how much I love Chaos’s cheesy, 80s-children’s-cartoon-level dialogue he shoots out of his characters’ mouths. I also love the tacky fonts he spews out of their mouths. Come on, Chaos. Really? You looked at that and said “looks good”? Then again, you thought that stupid-ass white ring around Wario’s car and some text was okay. Do you need to get your eyes checked, Chaos?

You want to play a fun game: switch the dialogue between any two characters in this comic and I can guarantee that it will still sound correct. In fact, you could replace any of these characters with any other character; they’re all the same! Yay bland characterization! You never want to put in too much effort and actually give people personalities, or any of that stupid shit. Just fancy fonts for me, please.


No. Just No. Bass in a Mario world = crap. Never put platformer sprites in an RPG.

God, Anonymous is really strict on this. Better tell Nintendo to can the Smash Bros. series: other video game characters in Mario games = crap. The great Anonymous decrees it.


This all has a reason. Try reading my various points about how this isn’t just a Marioland sprite comic. It uses everyone and anyone.

Oh come on, Chaos, none of this has any reason for occurring, and you know it. I wonder if this motherfucker even has a script for this thing. You know, that thing you make when you plan out your comic, so you’re not just making shit come out in the blue. Look it up sometime, Chaos.


make a comic that doesn’t have them and shut up then. It’s my comic, I’ll do it my way.


I was actually on Chaos’s side on this argument; not because I believe his comic is good, but because I think that there are far worse problems than Bass being in it. Hell, I would be madder that Bass isn’t in it, but that Chaos’s one character depicted as Bass is in it instead. I don’t want to question Chaos’s artistic license, but I’m not sure how far I will believe that Bass would just take orders from Wario or just blow the shit out of Link for shits and giggles.

However, I have to change my mind when I read that “Served.” part: Chaos actually congratulating himself for his magnificent burn. Clearly, Chaos’s ego goes where no ego has ever gone before. Just a tip, Chaos: Bragging about your own comments does not make you look better; other people bragging about you does. Bragging about yourself just makes you look like a conceited prick.

Not Logged In:

Whoever this other anonymous guy is needs to shut the hell up!

There seems to be some kind of battle between the “Anonymous”’s here. Whenever someone says something you disagree with, just tell them to shut up. That’s the intelligent and mature thing to do.

Also, note how nobody complains about this guy not using his “real” name. Hypocritical, much?


Note for anonymous: some Mario games are an RPG.

Um… wasn’t the RPG Anonymous was talking about a Mario game? I don’t remember Capcom ever releasing a Bass RPG, but I don’t pay much attention to Mega Man, so I don’t know. I sure remember that Bass sprite from Mega Man Battle Network.

#39 – Realisations of facial pain in relation to the floor at velocity…

“#39 – The comic in which a bunch of cluttered bullshit occurs and people blab trite utterances in tacky fonts.” At this point, I’m thinking that he’s trying to be humorous with these over-detailed comic titles, which would actually be the one thing kind of humorous about this comic. Then again, this comic might have been badly translated from Japanese; that would explain a lot of the language errors.

I’ll let this comic’s tackiness speak for itself. All I shall say is that I truly wish that Wario would shut his fucking face, because nothing that escaped from his larynx was worth the electricity Chaos wasted to produce it. In short, everything Wario says is groan-inducing, embarrassing and so cliché that Chaos might be in the running for writing for Archie & Friends.

Since he says “realisations” instead of “realizations”, that makes me wonder if he’s British, Canadian, Australian, or one of Britain’s former colonies; but I doubt that since Canadians are usually funny, British people are usually intelligent, and Australians are usually laid-back, while Chaos bitches whenever someone says his comic is “not funny”. And, more importantly, this guy sounds like such an arrogant asshole that you almost think he must be from the U.S.


that comment about the floor… it’s true.

awesome comic.

You have extensive experience with being knocked to the floor? Why is it that the more I learn about these commentators, the less comfortable I become?


this sucks

Forget every comment I have ever written: this is the epitome of commentary. Ebert just called Anonymous and asked him if Anonymous could teach him how to write such fantastic, brilliant criticism as this. Websnark and Bad Webcomics Wiki shut themselves down, with the knowledge that they would never even come close to matching this masterpiece.

Commander Chaos:

Give a reason, otherwise you’re proving yourself to be a bigger idiot than Ryan.

You know, I bet Ryan is that voice inside Chaos’s head that kept yelling at him. Otherwise, I have no clue who he is or why Chaos keeps bringing him up.

Slip TP:

This comic is great! I love the line “you never realize how hard the floor is until hit-it face first.” You get better every page!

Man, these people really get off on that line. They treat this motherfucker as if he were the next Voltaire.

#40 – Bass runs on Windows

I’m going to be honest here: I didn’t understand a god damn atom of this piece. Maybe it was Bass’s font, which was completely unreadable (and, for the record, should never be used in any comic ever. And unlike Anonymous, this rule actually has logic to back it up). Maybe it’s because the dialogue seems to me to be an accumulation of grunts and onomatopoeia. I’m glad that sexy white ring around blurred objects is back, and tackier than ever! I’m sure someone’s going to claim that “sexy white ring around blurred objects” is a literary device of some kind, like “making jokes about past characters”.


this still sucks.

Beyond all odds, Anonymous has richly added to his original, perfect comment. Notice how he uses the diction of “still” in order to illuminate how the comic “sucks” across a continuous temporal spectrum, as opposed to just a single moment in time?

Naturally, Chaos was not pleased with this brilliant comment, and asked for silly things such as “reasons” or “evidence”, to which Anonymous replies:

I’ve given you many reasons.

Yeah. For instance Chaos’s comic is still, and it sucks. Those are reasons: It sucks because it sucks.

Chaos writes a long-winded rant:

saying that something sucks is not a reason, it’s an opinion, and therefore it only applies to you. Before drunkduck disappeared, this was one of the most popular comics on it after about 5 weeks. So, according to loads of people who aren’t afraid to let me see their usernames it’s good, and according to you it’s not. Therefore it doesnt suck.

See how stupid that line of arguement is? I don’t mind people raring my comics badly, just as long as their criticism is constructive. How does telling me my comic sucks help me to improve it?

Besides, a lot of your criticisms fall apart if you actually read the pages you comment on. Also, in reply to your sad, pathetic comments about the extra characters and backgrounds I quote from the comic description; ‘features cameos from almost any video game character imaginable’

I’m not sure if those paragraph breaks are actually supposed to be paragraph breaks, since Chaos does them incorrectly; but I will assume that they are, as it would be logical. I know that assuming Chaos to be logical is a bit unrealistic, but bear with me here.

The first paragraph seems like it barely needs commenting on, since Chaos’s first point is so obvious that it is sad that he even had to say it. I know I complain about Chaos being an arrogant asshole, but this is one place where I think “it’s called logic, look it up sometime” would be vindicated. Of course, that would conflict with his second comment, which is that same illogical bullshit of “you won’t make up a fake name like me, so your opinions are not important”. Anonymous is his username; none of the other anonymous people are called that. It may be stupid and unoriginal, but so are all of yours’. At least it isn’t “SuperSaiyan77” or “SonicMaster44”.

Also, how did “drunkduck” disappear? They’re apparently still here. Maybe they added capitalization and spaces to their name, but they’re still alive and assaulting people’s tastes with their low standards like the best of them.

Chaos rescues himself in his second paragraph, as all are good points. However, let’s be honest here, Chaos: people have been giving you constructive criticism many times, and you either ignored it, or bitched at them. Hell, even Anonymous has made valid arguments, when not complaining about some random rule he made up being violated, or the comic being “not funny.”

I don’t quite understand how Anonymous’s arguments fall apart by reading these comics, especially when they’re so one-dimensional that they could apply to any comic. I mean, “this sucks” could apply to everything in the entire world. As for the extra characters, they would be fine if they made any god damn sense. You can’t just include different characters as humor; it can only supplement true humor.


oops, looks like I spoke too soon… now it really is the best comic! ☺

They’re praising these as the greatest hits of Bowser’s Plan B? The cluttered mess of tacky fonts, trite shouts and phrases straight out of Captain Planet used as dialogue? Because I personally thought that this was the worst part of the whole god damn comic, not including the filler. But in Chaos’s defense (well, not really) filler usually always sucks, so he’s following the status quo in that field. He could at least stop making the filler, though.

And what the fuck does “☺” mean, you god damn loony?


that box was supposed to be a smiley face…

Yes. Keep telling that to your Dadaist friends; they’ll agree with you.

#41 – Stairs Hurt

So does reading this comic, to your eyes. I think Chaos should have warned about headaches and seizures from reading his comic rather than death by laughter.

I find Wario’s dialogue in the middle panel quite discerning. I don’t remember Wario being that loyal towards people, especially some robot cameo he likely met a couple hours ago.


umm… good, but he’s putting his mouth on the wrong part of the ocarina. Easy mistake though.

That was supposed to be him playing an ocarina? I thought he was sucking on his mutant-enlarged arm like a god damn freak. Way to ruin the humor again, jerks.


hahaha… it looks like he’s eating the ocarina…

See? Even Duran agrees with me. Fuck this stupid bullshit: Chaos needs to make more mutant-arm sucking and exploding people with hammers.

#42 – Aspirin time

I’m gonna need some aspirin after reading this. By the way, I love that “poof” bubble used to show Link transporting. I’m sure that’s how transporting looked in the Zelda games.

I think Anonymous might have left for good, which is too bad. Although his opinions were often mind-numbingly simplistic, he at least balanced against the fellatio that the current commentators are giving to Chaos. And I’m serious: if any of his comics deserve mockery, notwithstanding his filler, these are the ones that deserve it the most.

#43 – Poke Poke

It’s “uh…”, I guess. Hey, wait: did that motherfucker finally add tails to his dialogue boxes? His dialogue is still cramped in the corners of the boxes, however.

Pancake Mix:

i think the “anonymous haters” are the same person.

That’s because it was the same person. “Anonymous” was literally his username. That’s why he’s called that and not “Not Logged In”.


aww, I hope link doesn’t die…

Duran sure cares about these imaginary characters. But, then again, we’ve already seen how crazy this guy is. This is especially amazing, considering how inauthentic and soulless these characters are. Shit, I would care more about a cardboard box being damaged than OmniLink-sue, here.

#44 – Trashed Throneroom

It’s passable, I guess. Sure is better than that battle bullshit before. I do wonder what the hell is up with Meta Knight’s Shakespearean accent (which is done badly, by the way. Don’t try accents, Chaos, that’s a little too high-level for you. I mean, you’re not fucking Mark Twain here.) Hell, you could have at least given Meta Knight his Spanish accent, like Hal Labs gives him. Then again, maybe that was what you were trying to do. Still not necessary, either way.


Facial expressions you be master thereof.

Sentence structure incorrect no me understanding good.

Yes, that giant eyeball he gave Bowser was brilliant work. I’m sure it took hours to find that circle and pencil tool. Well, at least he did it correctly, I guess. I often forget that I’m working with truly low standards here.

yours truely:

I like it

Well, now this is no different than Anonymous, except the opposite. Actually, that’s unfair to say: at least Anonymous could spell his fucking name correctly; “truely” is not a word, sir.

Not Logged In:

I dont like Meta Knights Medievil accent, but I still like this anyway

Don’t mention why you liked it, though. Hey, I like Bowser’s Plan B: it has shitty dialogue and the artwork is a cluttered mess. This actually sounds more like mocking people who enjoy the comic—as unbelievable people truly enjoying this work sounds in and of itself—than praising it. Maybe it is.

Not Logged In:

I don’t really like Metaknight’s pseudo-medival voice. Other than that, nice comic. Average, but nice.

We heard you the first time, jackass. Besides, how dare you comment on this comic—much less twice—without fabricating a name first.

#45 – Nuked

I wish this comic would get nuked.

Why yes, they certainly were nuked. Yup. That’s it, I guess. Nice eyeballs for Meta Knight in panel one, by the way. Jay Resop called: he wants his special effects back.

yours truely:

still good

I’m dead fucking serious: he’s the Anti-Anonymous.

#46 – Bowser Angry

Title Trite and Obnoxious.

Is Bass supposed to be a sociopath, or something? Why did he kill Meta Knight? Because he was stupid enough to think he was OmniLink, even though he obviously saw what OmniLink looks like and should know their appearances are in no way similar. The “I was about to ask you the same question. but [sic] I think I’ll just shoot you.” part just sealed the deal. And… ha ha ha, is that last panel supposed to be suspenseful or dramatic? It’s just laughably terrible. He’s a regular Steven Spielberg with that blurring effect, right there. And I just shivered with suspense after reading “RRRRRAAAAGGGHHH! I KILL YOU!”.

jef dam5:

Kill to prevent hte killing :)

This is such an interesting comment on society, such as the idea of war itself, that is completely ruined by this guy’s inability to type. It would be akin to typing “all peoples r corrupt its the ons htat have power than hrm peple ;)”.


I hope there’s a “BLUE PILL” around that will cure the nausea I feel right now. But, hey! Up the ass jokes! Keeping it classy, folks.


XD. My ass fell off from laughing so hard. Five outta five.

For god’s sake, keep that to yourself, please.

Not Logged In:

A suppository! I don’t even fully understand what that is and I Still Laughed my ass off, Which is rare.

“I had no idea what the joke was, but I still laughed because Chaos told my sheep-like brain to!” Rare, my ass: you motherfuckers would laugh if Chaos just drew a fucking triangle.

#48 – Insomnia Cure

This comic sure is one. God, it’s as if Chaos is trying to create lead-ins for jokes against his comic.

Nothing but more ass jokes. That’s basically a summary. Well, and OmniLink’s shitty font still assaulting eyeballs.


That is beyond the definintion of funny.

Wow, this video game system sure had a bloated opinion of this comic. Then again, based on his name having “LowRes” in it, I’m guessing that he does not have very high standards. Then again, he said it was beyond the “definintion” of funny, not the definition, so he may have been talking about something much less drastic.


Thank you muchly.

“You may have your lunch today, lowly servant.”

And it just goes on with more dick sucking. They could at least go into why they thought it was funny (other than because it involved anal regions). Next week on Bowser’s Plan B, OmnLink shits his pants ROFL!

Filler #3 – Enter the Commander

I hope this is supposed to be satire, and Chaos just did a shitty job of it, like he always does when he attempts any kind of humor (with the exception of ass-related humor, which anyone can do, really).

And what do you know, even his commentators are showing ambivalence towards this terrorist attack against humor. Most of it is “be careful with this, but I’m sure you’ll pull it off great!”, but still.

#49 – Thwak Down

You know, I’m really thinking this is satire. Unless Chaos admits that he’s a sociopathic, obnoxious asshole in real life, which might be possible. That “It’s a Madman!” at the beginning was annoying, and I needed my own pills to tolerate that, but… I can’t tell if this is idiotic bullshit or… idiotic satire.

yours truely:

its ok… its building up i hope

Ha ha ha! Even “yours cannot spell” couldn’t heap it with praise. “Well, it hasn’t given me cancer, yet; it’s leading to something that isn’t mind-numbingly terrible, I hope.”

Not Logged In:

Just thought that I’d let you know, your sprite’s mouth is shut as he’s talking.

Just though I’d let you know, everyone’s mouth is shut as they’re talking. That explains everything, actually. This one guy is doing ventriloquism: that is why everyone has the same, one-dimensional personality.


Chalk that one up to laziness on my part.

He sure seems accepting of the fact that he’s a lazy hack. Most people would try to stop being lazy; but not Chaos, apparently.

#50 – Frackin’ Big Gun

I don’t have time for this s, asterisk, asterisk, t!

Nope. He’s just using the author as a terrible—fucking atrocious—deus ex machina (literally!) to turn Mario back to normal, non-blue-pill form. Even though, you know, he could have just had a Goomba or someone hit him (if the Mario enemies weren’t too busy attacking each other, I guess).

In fact, all of the writing of this comic gives me a headache. I’m a huge fan of Luigi, but I actually wish Chaos-sue would shoot his stupid ass to oblivion so he’s just shut his fucking trap. “alhgjkgsauktytilsahvjkgagusklv9preoi;tyeaougflxcn jk,fdsbfilhsuotwqoil”. Look, I just wrote dialogue for Bowser’s Plan B, guys! Where’s my Eisner?

Nice gun sprite, though. I doubt Chaos drew it, but still. It has some good parts about it. They’re just consumed by the massive assault of incompetence this dialogue contains.

Not Logged In:

thats a frickin big gun!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111

Yes, that’s what the title said already, dumbass!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111111111

yours truely:

very big gun

I knew that gun would be the only thing these people could comment on. They all hate it, I know they do; they just won’t admit it.

Not Logged In:

I like that you censor your curse words.

Yeah, I like how you censor words I already know about so that I don’t have to remember that they exist. Thank you for insulting my intelligence.

#51 – Red Bull Required

Alcohol is required just to tolerate this banal crap.

Use better font choice? Never! You know, it looks like Bass harmed himself more than Bowser by falling onto that rock, but then he might have been physically harmed by the terrible joke told in the middle panel. Shit, it took so much energy out of Bowser to let that bomb drop out of his mouth that he’s short of breath in the last panel. Why should… I use too many ellipses? Overuse… of them is really… fucking annoying.

I won’t waste your time with the comments. No, they’re not all cock-stroking; but they’re just as inane. In fact, at least the cock-stroking was technically commenting on the comics. These comments were just saying things that were obviously apparent in the comic, or someone’s opinion of Red Bull, which I am certain that everyone is curious about.

#52 – Oh Snap

“Oh snap, my comic title is stupid as fuck.” Just to make Chaos lose even more points, that title is the punchline (as hard as it is to believe anyone would think that was a good punchline). What kind of idiot gives away the punchline in the comic title? That’s like if they named Citizen Kane “It was Rosebud’s Sled”, or named Star Wars “Darth Vader is Luke’s father”.

I will say, though, that that effect on Bowser does look pretty cool. A rare occurrence from someone who thought blurry white rings were tolerable in any kind of artwork.

Shadow X:

This is all right. But it’s got some strange things going on. Maybe you better change Bass’s font to something easier to read. It took me a little while to figure out what he was saying. If that’s blood coming out of the Koopa’s shell, why not shade it? Then it won’t be such an eyesore. It’s not bad though, just try to work on some of the visualizations.

What the hell is this? Logical commentary? This doesn’t belong here!


Pretty good but you could of maybe carried on the story form were you left off or make Bowsers Plan B 2 or something

Um… What? I’m pretty certain the story does continue on. All I know is that the last thing the world needs is a “Bowser’s Plan B 2”, even if this title’s missing the apostrophe. Then again, this person apparently couldn’t figure out how to use a spacebar when typing out his name, either.

The Commander:

Good comic but what font do you use for Bass!?

“I want to know what font you can use so I can ruin my own comic with its tackiness.” Chaos is the only commander here, son, and that’s confidential evidence.

A couple of comments by himself later, Chaos says randomly:

Oh come now, why a 1? At least give a reason!

I’ve read through the comments, and cannot find anyone giving him a one. Tell those voices in your head to stop giving your comics low ratings, Chaos; I’m worried about you.

Lord of Dragons:

Heeeeeess baaaaacccckkkk…..

See? Even Lord of Dragons is afraid; and that motherfucker controls one of the strongest species that ever… um, doesn’t exist, I guess. Man, you really got shafted there, Lord of Dragons; just like that Greek God of Vine, or the God of Toilet Seats.

#53 – Headbutting Rocks

What Chaos does every morning before writing Bowser’s Plan B.

Painful pun, here I come!

So, what, did running into that rock make Bowser spiral into another dimension?

Without Anonymous there to piss off everyone, the comments section has obviously become devoid of any entertainment. Two people post about… how they’re posting. And Duran…

to answer my question, yes, yes it is…

Well, Duran’s Duran. To answer your question: no, there is no context that you are missing here. That comment made absolutely—or should I say “absolutly”—no sense there, as it does here.

#54 – Rolling

Any third world country that ever thought that the first world countries are so technologically advanced, take a look at this wonder. Your minds will be changed forever. And if you don’t get the joke, don’t worry: none of us can, either. Unless, of course, the joke is supposed to be the artwork. Must be satirizing those Irish manga makers again, damn them!

#55 – Kamek’s Brainwave…

I agree with Kamek: do anything that ends this banal, never ending storyline. What’s this bullshit have to do with Bowser trying to off Mario and Luigi, anyway?

Shitty font that’s unreadable? Check. Blurry white rings? Check. Continue doing these things despite complaints about them—the latter being many pages ago? Check.

yours truely:

oh man thats a great idea…. ok its not a GREAT idea but a good one i give a 5 cause i dont think can give a 4 1/2

He’s so uncertain about it. Don’t worry, person with incorrectly-spelled name: Chaos will soon change his rating system so you can give his comics the 4.157 rating they deserve.

#56 – Poor Kamek.

Chaos’s comic isn’t even bad enough to make fun of anymore. It’s just… mediocre now. I mean, I guess Kamek about to be hurt is a punchline. It’s not funny, but it does not make me want to strangle someone with rage. And the font’s still so ugly that the A’s look like O’s, but I’ve already made fun of that like twenty times.


Uh…did Bass’ font change in the second panel, or is that just my eyes f*cking up again?

It has been changing around multiple times. Chaos has no god damn clue what he is doing.

yours truely:

ok its gettin back to the comical comic i love

As opposed to what? The dramatic comic? I sure remember the drama of when Mario had to shove a blue pill up OmniLink’s asshole. Mario and Luigi then cried when they learned that OmniLink had a miscarriage, and his husband committed suicide after being fired from work.

#57 – Parting Gift

Panel One: Ass-Ugly Theater, Panel Two: lead-in to stupid joke, Panel Three: stupid joke commences. Have you noticed that every comic seems to end with “Uh oh, somebody’s gonna be hurt!” How much can you beat a dead horse, you sick fuck. Yeah, I know you get sexual pleasure out of whipping Black Stallion’s grave, Chaos. You don’t fool me.

#58 – Shockwaves

You already told the joke, Chaos; you do not need to elaborate on it further. We can already assume that the Bob-Omb blew up and Wily was hurt.

Pancake Mix:

actually,this is impossible.A nulear bomb at 50 megatons wouldn’t be able to do this sort of thing,unless it was within 100 miles of the blast.

Last time I checked, Bob-Ombs weren’t nuclear weapons. If they were, then the Mushroom Kingdom and Koopa Kingdom would be in a cold war, and Toads would have to do useless exercises, like hiding under their desks.


Thanks, I’m really concerned about putting realism into this Sprite Comic (!) because its so realistic anyway, isn’t it, what with mushrooms that make people grow, talking turtles and dinosaurs.

At least we’ll always have Chaos here to act like a total asshole. Sure maybe Pancake Mix’s comment was nugatory, but there’s nothing else important to say about this god damn page. You don’t want your commentators going on about how they’re posting, do you? By the way, what the fuck is (!) supposed to mean? Are you making it optional whether or not you’re yelling that part or simply stating it?


5 KILOTONS OF NUCLEAR EXPLOSIVES TO KILL ONE MAN?!?!?!!? JESUS CHRIST, Bass, what hell is wrong with you?!?

Even Duran is opposed to this mindless violence. Then again, you have to remember that just earlier Bass was killing people for pretty much no reason: “I was going to ask something. But I’ll just kill you for fun”. Or maybe that was OmniLink. Shit, I can’t tell any of these characters apart.

#59 – Negative IQ

Chaos must have a negative IQ to make something this stupid. Did Chaos make Mega Man stupid to make fun of Bob and George rip-offs or… to rip-off Bob and George himself? Either way, it isn’t done humorously, probably because he says it so matter-of-fact-like that it stood no chance. You don’t introduce stupid characters by having another character introduce them as a stupid character. They should show that they’re stupid. Furthermore, you shouldn’t have a “stupid character”. Nobody has stupidity as their only personal trait. (Okay, so you did add “blows shit up”, but that’s not enough either.) Besides, “dumbass character who loves to blow shit up” comes straight out of the Dumbass Book of Sprite Comic Cliché. Can’t you do anything creative for once, Chaos?

Oh, and thank you for finally fixing those dialogue boxes. But you might want to work on those tails. Maybe give them some slim fat.


GAH! Yet another comic that projects MegaMan as a an idiot…I’m sorry, but I’m going to have to rate you a 3 for that.

I would rate it a negative number, since by doing that he really didn’t write a comic at all. Writing a comic requires originality; he just stole a comic from the millions of other blind rip-offs of Bob and George.

“evertime” was sure pissed about it. I’m sure he carries a photo of Mega Man with him wherever he goes.

#60 – Laughter and Concequences

The only laughter that occurs is caused by the “concequences” of your bad spelling.

So, what were they laughing at, again? Certainly not this comic, because I looked all over and could find absolutely no humor present. Maybe Mega Man looks weird? He doesn’t look any weirder than Chaos-sue, there. Why did you put yourself in this comic, again, Chaos? You know that’s just asking for trouble.


Also, I know that the Commander’s text isn’t that good, but I was experimenting…and amazingly tired, when I made this.

It looks a hell of a lot better than Bass’s eye-raping font. And what do you mean “amazingly tired”? What, are we supposed to be surprised that our great Commander gets tired once and a while? Shit, I would be tired all of the time if I had to pump out this banal shit so often.


i don’t care how bad the text is i am just pleased to see the comic is back.

Thank you, friend of Chaos’s. Don’t forget to have your mother log on and compliment you on his fantastic comic, Chaos.

jef dam5:

Next time don’t but bspeechbubble ”pointers” ”above” a speech bubble (i suck at English)

One, why not? Two, he doesn’t, so it’s a moot point.

#61 – Green Lasery Death

I bet you could just read the comic titles and know the whole story of Bowser’s Plan B. Let me guess: in this one someone dies from being shot by a green laser.

Mega Man, go fuck yourself and die in a ditch; Chaos-sue, go fuck yourself and die in a ditch, too, because you’re not a likeable character, either. None of these characters are, but Mega Man and Chaos-sue are especially unlikable. In fact, they’re painfully annoying. Mega Man is the “look, he’s stupid! He said ‘cheese!’ Isn’t that so random?” Except, no, it isn’t random, and it isn’t funny. Every dumbass and his mother have made someone say “cheese” to try to be random, with similarly awful results. And here’s a tip, Chaos: having your character be badass and be able to shoot anyone does not make your character better. In fact, it makes him an annoying Mary Sue.

I don’t even care if this is supposed to be satirical (and I can’t imagine anyone writing something this stupid unless they were being facetious); he still fails. You cannot just mimic stupid comics to be funny, because it will just be a stupid comic, like the comics you’re trying to make fun of. Duh. You actually have to comment on it. For example, why is the “Mega Man is dumb” cliché not funny? Why is having the author enter the comic as a badass god annoying? Chaos does not address these ideas. He simply regurgitates them like every other mindless sprite comic creator.

This is funny, because I am sure many people are going to complain about me beating on people’s personal, creative work. But this is not creative; this isn’t even Chaos’s work. There is absolutely nothing original about it. I mean, come on, aren’t any of you humans? Don’t you have some creativity? Something unique to say?

Commander Chaos:

Oh for God’s sake! What the hell is your problem?! Are you scared to leave your name and be labelled as a twat? At least give a f**king reason, arsehole!

Oh, man, this just gets funnier and funnier. Did Anonymous delete a random arrangement of his old comments just to make Chaos look bat-shit crazy (and we really didn’t need Anonymous’s help for that)?

Maybe he is British, since he said “arse”. Then again, a lot of people say that just to censor “ass”, so who knows? I’m sure you’re all very interested, though.


yeah i think that guy did it to me too. The Anonymouse name thing i mean

“Man, he’s tried to invade my head too. Wicked.”

Filler #4 – Impure Thoughts

I’m having impure thoughts about this god damn comic. What relevance does this have to the story? And when did Yoshi and Boshi decide to take a vacation in the white abyss? It seems pretty sad when one cannot even muster the effort to go find a random background in VisualBoy to copy and paste in. I know you have an advantage by being able to just use graphics someone else created; but do not feel like you have to handicap yourselves so that the people who actually draw their own work do not feel cheated. There are people who actually draw their own backgrounds who would never let this shit slide, so neither should you, Chaos.

He did add two tacky eyeballs, though. I love how you can still see Yoshi’s normal eyes below them. Yeah, don’t even take the time to color that in green, why don’t you.

All of the commentators just giggle and shout about this joke like a bunch of elementary school kids who have never heard of sex before. Maybe that is true, but then this comic would be a little inappropriate when you remember—and I wouldn’t blame you if you tried not to—that “blue pill” joke.

Filler #5 – Depression

What I am feeling right now after reading all of these comics. Now I know why all of those children were yelling about how they were going to commit suicide after reading that comic. Shit, I feel like doing it right now.

Apparently Peach somehow made it back to the Mushroom Kingdom safely, without the Mario Bros’ help. That means we can end this comic, right?


poor peach…but Bowser does take her places…not that she wants to go with him.

I thought Chaos had you assassinated… I mean, I don’t know anything. I didn’t say that. By the way, he enlisted in our favorite fascist leader, Red Shirt’s, help.

Apparently Bowser forgot to take Peach places this time; unless he also took her back to the Mushroom Kingdom like a dumbass.


Didn’t bowser kidnap her?

That’s what I was wondering. Actually, Chaos got so bored with his Artistic License against Nintendo canon that he decided to ignore his own comic’s canon. Some would call this discontinuity, and an error, but we all know that Chaos here is being a creative genius.

Filler #6 – Bang Bang

The sound that will be coming out of my room soon once I shoot myself in the mouth.

You just have to love Chaos’s exquisite writing. It’s so clever. Here’s me, as a stupid Mega Man recolor (nobody’s done that yet) with a large gun shooting at Pikachu. See, the humor is… GROWL DIE PIKACHU!! BLAM BLAM BLAM BLAM BLAM BLAM!!! Rate this five, please.

By the way, Chaos-sue may need to find a better gun; all that one seems to do is make a messy explosion centimeters in front of it. Hell, Pikachu’s still just fine despite being only a foot away from the gun. How bad can your aim be?

Not Logged In:

I like this filler

I’m sorry. Hey, if you want I can scribble on a piece of paper and write whatever random bullshit my year-old nephew says. It will be just as entertaining—and will take just as much effort—as this work.


yelling ‘Chaos’ explained: It’s Commander_Chaos’ warcry.

Thanks, we were afraid that you were talking to yourself… again. It certainly is a unique war cry (Saying one’s name? Crazy!), so I could understand why other people would be confused by it.


funny…. :)

How about you use some logic here and explain to me how this comic is funny, unless you mean the idea that Chaos actually thought this was a presentable work. I guess I’m just not a part of the “maniacs who run around shooting at Pikachus, but missing, and shouting like deranged idiots” demographic. He could have at least thought of a better punchline than something a toddler says whenever he’s playing with toy trucks. This belongs on Timmy G. Dipshit’s mother’s fridge, not on the internet.

Not Logged In:

ah, the death of the yellow rat, it gives me the urge to start doin gviolent random things.

The manner in which these people get so excited over random violence makes me wonder if they are just easily amused, or all live in the mental ward. I swear to god that every one of these people needs to take some Ritalin, or some kind of drug.


How can you be so cruel commander chaos?!

I don’t like this page.

Pikachu is so cool.

I guess Nintendude was really offended by the prospect of an imaginary character being killed. I like Pikachu, too, but I would be more offended by the fact that Chaos treated my loyalty to reading his comic with this equivalent of being defecated on. I’m sure that Chaos will just berate my complains by pointing out that he was being nice to his fans by half-assing this comic.

Filler #7 – Just For Jokes

How about you make some jokes for once? And no, Super Sonic, nothing in this world is sacred once Chaos first put his filthy hands on a keyboard. I think I now know why he’s called Chaos: this comic is the pure evil that the Final Fantasy heroes were fighting against.

Aussie kid


Well, crickey, it sounds as if he doesn’t even understand it, but rated five just to be nice. Look, if you people keep babying Chaos he’ll never learn, and he’ll keep vomiting out these wastes of electricity.



I guess Chaos finally had him silenced once and for all. Anonymous knew that dangers of dissent. Hell, that’s why Chaos kept clamoring to know his name: he finally found out who this heretic was and had him taken care of. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to change my name and move to Switzerland.


It’s good to have a sonic joke randomly coming. good work.

I hope he’s being sarcastic. In fact, wasn’t he the one who made that crack about the “3-D sprites”?

#62 – OOps…I broke the Marios!

“OOps”…I broke the English language!

Mario and Luigi are not in horror because Chaos-sue killed Mega Man (because we’re all glad that fucking douche bag is dead); they’re still in horror over reading those terrible filler strips.

This comic isn’t even bad; it’s just mediocre. Like panel three: does the audience really need an explanation given to them? (Answer: no). Just do the Flintstones treatment on them and fade out and in over the story.


not quite sure what a goomba-prod is

It might be a prod you use on Goombas.

Not Logged In:

Your comic has managed to lower my IQ a few points…

And for that, I thank you. Keep up the good work.

I just wanted to make sure you saw the low point Chaos’s fans have taken to praising his “good work”.


……Maybe its okay….well I don`t really understand whats going on?Oh and what is a goomba-prod?(I don`t know alot about Mario)

I don’t think you guys know much about the real world, either. It’s like they’re smart enough to understand words by themselves, but do not understand the complicated procedure of putting words together to create a new meaning. Do you know what a prod is? Good. Now, what is a Goomba? Put them together, and you’ll understand it.


So you’ve returned Mrcool…

Anonymous got his own imaginary friend, too, Chaos. So there!


……Maybe its okay….well I don`t really understand whats going on?Oh and what is a goomba-prod?(I don`t know alot about Mario)

What, are you plagiarizing Darkness’s question? Is this supposed to be making fun of how stupid he is?


AAAAAAARGH! SHITTY FILLER! IT’S EXCREMENTED! HIYAAAAAA! “I have use my bad English skills and laziness to make this terrible filler! Shittily!”

Amazingly enough, the readers were not pleased. I can’t blame them for speaking up, since after the eighth random vomit on canvas put up here I would be sick of the abuse. I like to think of them as victims of spousal abuse who just keep going back to their spouse, I guess because they’re afraid that there are no other sprite comics out there for them or they believe they deserve it. It’s just good to see them finally standing up to their abusive lover before Chaos scans in a tissue after he’s blown his nose on it and calls it a “comic”.


Your a jerk. Your like “oh your views on politics are poor, communism is just like nazism LOLOLLOLOLOLOL!!! I made fun of the commie” STFU you clearly don’t know the difference between Stalinism and Marxism!

I guess now the invisible voices are making fun of people’s political beliefs now? I wouldn’t be surprised if RedShirt was behind all of this.


@ Communist: Communism is for the Naive, get over yourself.

“I thought I told RedShirt to lock up all of the dissenters! He already let Anonymous escape, damn him!”

Every single uncreative doofus on this damn comments section: “HONOURABLE! isnt it hilerious to repeat lines frm the comic over nd over agan”

Filler #9 – Revenge…

Revenge of the ellipses! Watch Chaos take a chainsaw against quality.


Page 63 is in the works by the way, so I haven’t abondoned the actual story.

I don’t know how you could have found the time to make it, considering the effort put into these amazing fillers.

#63 – Exit C.C / Apple Sponsored Marketing!!

Exit entertainment! Oh wait, it never entered.

This is what took you so long to make? Chaos, are you armless or something? Because a normal person could crap that up in a couple of minutes.

The font’s a little better. Maybe all of that time was spent trying to find a font that doesn’t look like ass. Bowser’s font, though, still looks like ass. So now I’m wondering how Chaos thought both the first and second fonts were of equal quality. That would be like comparing the Sistine Chapel to some hobo’s diarrhea.


Nice job! Love the satirical attack lol. Keep it coming!

What satirical attack? That iPods make you waste your time singing along to Billy Joel songs instead of planning to attack two Italian plumbers to prevent them from rescuing a princess who miraculously already returned to the Mushroom Kingdom without anyone knowing?

#64 – Deciding the course of action…

I think the bigger question is where we are going to find jokes to tell. Otherwise, this comic is alright. I mean, anything’s better than that filler bullshit.


So no more itailan accent? Aww ….

Thank god.

#65 – Decisions, decisions…

So, what, were Toads and Pikmin the only two choices you had? You can’t just say, “well, they’re better than Toads; that means they’re the only option!” How about you pick someone a little stronger than Toads or Pikmin. Like a dust bunny.

At this point, Chaos improved the visuals of his comic, ascending from the level of “holy shit, are you retarded?” to just boring, which is where Pokémon-X now lies, and is probably how most sprite comic creators progress. Unfortunately, this is the point where a comic ceases to be funny to make fun of, ironically making it so mediocre that it somehow becomes worse than the earlier comics. This is why I never did the later Pokémon-X strips. I tried to, but they were too god damn boring to make fun of.

Thus, I may not do the rest of the comics. Either way, this should be enough for now. Maybe I’ll do the rest later.

-J.J.W. Mezun

(Revised: July 30, 2011)

(Originally Published: May 14, 2010)


About J. J. W. Mezun

J. J. W. Mezun wants you punks off his lawn.
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